“You shouldn’t run. There are other exercises you can do.”

For a while I listened and thought, OK, I can do yoga, walk,  some video exercise. After all, I need to do what’s best for my heart, and running doesn’t seem to be what’s best. The twenty-four hour halter monitor showed that while I had been jogging, my heart rate had gone up to 189 beats per minute. No wonder I felt dizzy afterward.

When I sat in the doctor’s office yesterday, he offered various routes we could take. He said that the choice was up to me: what did I want. I leaned forward and told him, “I want to run. So I’ll do whatever it takes, whatever I need to do, to run, not lightly jog, but run.”

Because there’s nothing like it. I am tired of walking and jogging when I have this desire to blaze down the road and burn up the pavement. I remember being in the gym at school one day and seeing this guy full out run. As his arms and legs pumped and flew, I thought, That’s what I want to do.

Tonight I watched the movie Secretariat, which was surprisingly good. I admire the main character, how she won’t back down and how she fights hard despite the risks. One line of hers stood out to me: “You never know how far you can run unless you run.”

I want to find out.